So maybe I’m a little emotional today.

Maybe I’m more in-tune with nature or something.

But I was reading CNN.com when I noted that there was a new Baby gorilla at the Boston Zoo.

News that, although interesting, would normally get no greater a response from me that “Oh cool, one more Gorilla in the world!”

But today was different.

One zoo worker was quoted as saying:

“Kiki has just hugged onto this baby since it was born.

She just seems to be reveling in motherhood,”

I’d say so I mean look at that picture!

That mother gorilla is smiling!

Smiling and holding her new born.

And for some reason this really made me smile.

First because this looks like pretty clear evidence to me of the very real and complex emotions some animals have.

And second because both these gorillas look so happy.

Zoo or no zoo they are supremely happy.

I’m not sure I can get myself to “supremely happy” but thanks to Kiki’s inspiration I have decided to be happy today.

Cube or no cube.

So I was thinking the other day about the changing emotion of Christmas.

Or more to the point… the changing perception of people.

I can, like reviewing a home movie, conjure up mental images of my boyhood self on Christmas morning. Waking up at some ridiculous hour of the morning, and assuming (because the sun was up) that Santa had already left and it was safe to leave my room. Then I’d wake Dave so he could help me wake up Mom & Dad, and we could Christmas started!

We’d invariably be told to go back to bed for at least 4 more hours.

Right.

Back to bed.

Being told “Yes the presents are ready… but it’s too early to go down.” pretty much ensured there would be no more sleep for us.

This routine would repeat itself a couple of time before Mom and/or Dad would cave in and finally mumble. “ok ok ok… we’re up…we’re up…ok”

Dave and I would Race to the top of the stairs and sit on the very first step.

(We weren’t allowed to start racing down until EVERYONE was ready to go.)

We’d sit there staring each other down in anticipation of the great challenge… to be the FIRST of us to see the presents and the tree.

Ted would wander of his room shortly after we yell into his dreaming head that “They’re ready! THEY’RE READY!!” And once Mom and Dad appeared Dave and I took our marks like Olympic Track runners.

(I always liked to be on the side of the step nearest the banister so I could use the raling to get an extra bit of thrust off the step)

Each year one of us got the glory of being the first to release the melodramatic “OHHHHH!” or “WOW!!!!” or “OOOOOOOOO OHHHHH WOW!!!”

(it got more theatrical each year… like an arms race.)

I can recall with vivid clarity all of these things.

I can even remember some of the best presents from various years.

What is difficult is trying to relive the FEELING behind it all.

The anticipation that kept me up on Christmas eve.

The excitement that made 3:00 AM seem a perfectly reasonable time to get everyone up.

The joy filled stupidity that ONE year convinced me that screaming “FIRE” 1 inch from my Dad’s ear would be a “Funny” way to start Christmas a bit earlier.

That’s the hard part.

Everyone knows the saying “Like a kid on Christmas morning.” but can you really relate to it? Not just visualize it… FEEL it.

It’s hard.

I wish I could bring that emotion up as easily as I can recall the images.

It’s this time of year that I really envy the kids.

(heck who am I kidding… I envy them all the time)

Well Taylor Anderson; My friend, Fraternity Brother, and college Roomie has apparently bought a MIN-VAN!

What the Hell?!?!

You have ONE kid Taylor… ONE!

And he could probably still fit in the glove box at this point.

You need a mini-van?

Is Liz Prego again?!?!

What about the Suburban?

That thing didn’t have enough room for you?

Needed something with a little more power and style maybe?

Oh man…

Unless it’s got an 8-Track player, and shag carpet I think you’ve made a horrible mistake.

(if it had all that then it would at least be a hilarious ride)

Mini-Vans are like KFC chicken.

You don’t want to like them… you know it’s bad for you.

But once you have a bite… you gotta go back.

My parents bought one when were kids.

They have a NEW one now… and there are no kids at home.

You’ll never get out from under the Mini-Van spell now.

Liz must be Prego… again.

Good God dude let the woman sleep!

Well… It’s Thursday.

It’s been an incredibly long week given that this has actually been a short week.

Go figure.

(be sure to show your work)

On the upside Audra showed up, and Ted commented FIRST on a Blog that racked up more than a couple comments. No more talk of Blog curses Ted.

I had a tremulously funny Blog for today but I’m afraid I can’t post it. Since I work for a living and there’s no telling who may see this site… I need to watch what I say just a little bit.

But don’t worry once my plan is complete I can post with reckless abandon. Fearing not what “The Man” may think of it.

The next 2 days here at work are going to be a mad house. Ugh.

But at least We’re getting closer and closer to the next airing of Star Trek Enterprise.

Sad the things we live for when a “JOB” takes up 98% of your waking life.

Wow how sad is that.

But it’s basically the truth. We all work about 50 weeks a year to get 2 off. That’s just wrong. We should be spending out lives living it. Learning things we always wanted to… spending time with friends, family, a good book. Improving society a bit by smiling once and a while….

… I need to win the lottery and take up writing or painting… or whistling.

Ok seriously this is getting depressing.

Nobody reads this damned thing anymore.

This past weekend Jana and I went to Chicago and hung out with Dave.

I met all sorts of new people.

Some of whom (Audra….) expressed to Dave that he should see to it that we came to Chicago.

But none of them gave me any help when I posted a blog asking for it.

Audra came up with a brilliant excuse, saying that she couldn’t comment because she didn’t REALLY know me. But now that he had met me she would be a commenting fool.

Really….

I suppose time will tell.

Odd though that you commented on Dave’s Blog about your newfound ability to comment on mine.

So now I’m torn…

Do I take the ol’ website down for awhile?

I could let it sit with a cast picture of Fraggle Rock or something.

Then I could always re-launch it after I finish up my other sites and have time to UPGRADE dougmeade.com.

(as always there are big plans for new features and re-works)

Do I Blog about the BRILLIANT cigar I had this weekend even though most of you couldn’t care less?

Do I Blog about the woes of home ownership and everyday work life?

HELL NO!! I’m trying to escape that shit.

Perhaps I could make something up entirely.

I did that once and it went over pretty well.

Maybe I’ll post a series of fictional Blogs.

My life could be VERY interesting all the sudden.

Ok ok ok…

So it’s been a long time since I Blogged.

And this after I promised to do better.

No wonder readership is low.

I have several excuses… none of which you probably care about.

But hopefully I’ll soon be launching two new sites… the development of which has been keeping me very busy.

Work is so hectic there’s not much time to Blog.(even at lunch)

Seriously I’ve been up at 6:00 AM for the past week and half. Those that know me will testify that this is remarkable.

Needless to say I’ve been very tired.

Thursday after another 12 hour work day I was headed home at 7:00pm

I had to talk myself out of using a convenient red light as an excuse to “rest my eyes”.

You know you’re tired when the windshield wipers that have been on all the way home… suddenly scare you!

And I mean a jump, gasp, grab your chest type scare you.

Well thankfully this is a short week for me.

I’m on vacation from the 11th - 15th. Jana and I were going to go Vegas… but now we’re not.

We’re still debating one what we will do.

Feel free to leave your ideas in the comments area.

So here we are.

November 1st, 2004 5:32 PM.

We’re on the eve of election day.
The day we all decide who should be president.
A big election without a doubt.

I tend to get a bit worked up over politics so I’m not going to go on and on about who I think is the better option.

Quite the opposite in fact.

As I watch Tom Brokaw tally the electoral votes I tomorrow I’ll be watching with great interest. Honestly I’ll probably sit in front of the TV and eat pretzels and popcorn… I mean this election is gonna be close! Like a good basketball game I expect lots of tense action.

And when it’s all said and done… if my guy doesn’t win… I’ll probably put my fist through the TV, bleed from the eyes and ears, run in place for no clear reason, and swear in such a way that the English language itself will be unable to handle the streaming request for new and more vulgar obscenities.

But once that’s done… that’ll be pretty much it.

I hope we can all agree to keep the melt downs at home.

Over the past couple of years I’ve noticed one thing over and over and over.

Politics, more than any other thing, has the power to ruin a nice dinner, a good cigar, previously cordial relationships at work, and even a nice evening with friends.

Wow is it really worth it to get so heated with people?

Do we really think that if we just explain our take on it one more time… a little louder.. THEN the mindless fool that is voting the wrong way will suddenly get it?

Do we think that everyone in the other party is a propaganda eating zombie?

(ooh… propaganda eating zombie. I’m gonna store that away in case I need it for my stream of obscenities)

The bottom line people is this:

If some one cares enough about politics to debate it with you…

You ain’t gonna change their mind.
At most you’ll get them to concede that your point isn’t COMPLETELY asinine.

To me that’s just not worth the blood pressure medication.

Democrats, Republicans, Lunatics… I mean Ralph Nader… they’re all trying to do what’s best for the country. Even if YOU think that their methodology is ridiculous.

So let’s try to go on being nice November 2nd.

(Hey I’m just trying to save some of you from a stroke.)

So I’m trying to eat healthy.

It’s not easy, especially given that eating healthy means reducing (if not giving up) diet coke. (the dark master that I have served since childhood)

I’ve not been able to give it up completely, and although the past few days have been weak points for me I have cut back a great deal.

Today for instance I went to the vending machine.

And although my eyes were hazy and head was trying to nurture a fledging headache… I was drawn to the oddest of things.

WATER.

I tried twice to push the Diet Coke button… but I needed the water more.

How odd.

This surely makes the master angry.

Last week when I was really cutting back I almost faltered.

This is what happened the first week I tried to cut back:

Day 1)

I went to the same vending machine to get water. (the reverse of what happened today)

I hit the water button and the machine gave me a bottle of refreshing Dasani water… AND TWO MOUNTAIN DEWS!!!

EVIL MACHINE!!

Day 2)

Again I went to the same vending machine to get water.

I hit diet coke without thinking about it.

“Damn!” I thought.

But all was not lost.

(I am allowed SOME diet coke after all)

I grabbed the bottle and walked to my meeting.

Five or ten minutes into the meeting I twisted the cap off and listened to the wonderful “fiz” of the soda as it welcomed me home.

I indulged in a big gulp only be horrified at what I instantly knew was NOT DIET coke.

It was straight up syrup laden coke.

EVIL MACHINE!!

I somehow choked, snorted and gagged all at once.

I frightened the people next to me.

Raising a hand I said…

“sorry… sorry… I’m sorry….” I took a deep breath and looked up … “not diet.”

There was a brief silence and then the meeting continued.

It’s been a rough week 1.

I hope this week goes better…. stupid machine.